How I’m Staying Occupied in Isolation

This post is part of a collaboration between me and a group of other talented, female bloggers. We have since started a group called the blog brew. All of their links are at the bottom of this post so please make sure to support their posts too! I wanted to bring you a post about things I am getting up to whilst being isolated.

In the UK we are about 3 weeks into lockdown, we can only go out for food shopping, medical care and one outdoor exercise activity per day. Being confined to a house, I have been trying to get as creative as possible! Please stay at home and stay safe.


Spending more time with family

My mum and dad both work 5 days a week so I don’t get much time with them to spend as a proper family. Having the time to spend with them now is the best thing ever, I am making sure we can stay focused by doing puzzles, playing board games, baking and being active. I even have made Thursday night our quiz nights! My family does get very competitive when it comes to board games though, do yours?


Watching movies & TV shows

I hopped on the bandwagon and got Disney+ to keep me entertained. I don’t really watch normal TV, just the odd game show here and there so having the ability to go and watch as many movies as I like is brilliant for me. I made a list of everything I wanted to see and I have gotten through it pretty quickly. There were loads of new releases I checked out, last night I watched Lady and The Tramp (2019) and then Bohemian Rhapsody! So amazing! My TV show of choice is Grey’s Anatomy and The ACT.

Setting Goals/learning new things


I have now got the time to do as many things as I would like to. I thought the best way to spend my time would be by being productive and learning a few things. My friend sent me a link to courses through Wowcher, I have found a makeup course which I’m now studying and will earn a certificate for at the end. When I started getting bored of lockdown by week 2, I decided to sit and make a list of all the things I wanted to learn and achieve by the end of it:

  • Learn to bullet journal
  • Learn more songs on the piano
  • Do a course of some sort
  • Learn how to draw illustrations

Working Out


I have been a little bit reluctant to even go out walking now because people are idiotic and can’t seem to stick to the distancing rules so I have stayed away from going out and walking the dog. Instead, I have turned to online workouts, HIIT from home and playing football in the garden. In the first week of lockdown, I stayed on the sofa, didn’t move or workout but now I know that by getting my body moving will also help distract my mind too.

Chilling out


One of the main things is making sure I do have my chillout times. The excuse of not having any work to go to or being able to go out means I can spend more time sleeping in, playing as much Sims as I can and staying in my pj’s all day. Some days I am a little bit lazy and don’t get dressed or wake up till about 3pm but I might as well enjoy it whilst I can.

Even though I have been posting about COVID 19 and how I keep occupied, please learn the right tips to stay safe during this pandemic. Stay home, stay safe, protect our NHS. Take care – Beth x




Please go support these ladies! Check out their posts too. 

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Let’s Talk – Toxic Relationships

Toxic people come in all shapes and sizes. Not everyone is an obvious toxic person as they don’t walk around with a huge sign stating it and it can be hard when they have also manipulated you into putting up with their nonsense. I wanted to talk about this as I have recently left multiple friendships/relationships that were extremely toxic and unhealthy. I want to showcase what it does to a person, how badly it affects your mental health and how life afterwards really is.

Before we head straight into the post I just want to point out I am talking from personal experience, my advice is my own opinion and everyone’s situation is different!

I have been in multiple toxic friendships/relationships over the course of my life, I’m only 22 so I have obviously put up with and been through a lot for my age. Being in one is one of the most tiring things I think I have ever endured. For some people, it might be less severe than that but in my experience, it’s been draining. Toxicity has a fine line of being just toxic and then being abusive, I, unfortunately, have suffered being in both of these situations and I am sure my readers have been also.

If I was to be kind to myself I would describe myself as a nice, caring person who wants to help anyone I can. That in itself can make you a little naive and susceptible to being taken advantage of by people who couldn’t care less about you. Wanting to please someone all the time is something I have naturally struggled with since being a child and has reflected into all of my friendships and relationships throughout life. If you’re anything like me you understand what I mean when I say you’d bend over backwards for someone even if they weren’t giving you anything in return. Even after people around me had pointed out these people were using me and were cruel I still thought I was the problem and maybe it was me that wasn’t doing enough. How wrong was I…


As mentioned before, toxic people come in all shapes and sizes, most commonly friends and partners. Although, some parents can also be toxic towards their children also. People do usually show signs and red flags, but, we easily ignore them because we want to be accepted or loved. It is pretty common.

They use manipulative tactics to make life as hard as it can be for you. Making someone feel as small as they can is essential to them!

“This ‘friend’ slowly turned me against my true friends. I had looked up to her and admired her, and I was always seeking for her approval. She would reward make me feel happy and rewarded whenever I ignored another friend or said something terrible to them. ” –

It can be extremely stressful when you have to deal with someone who is toxic. For me it would be feeling so sick to check my phone I would turn it off for days on end, if I knew I’d be left on read I would have to delete the conversation with this person so I’d be able to go back onto the app we were talking on without feeling obsessive about checking when they were last online or if they were replying. My hair would fall out in clumps and I’d feel unwell having to deal with these people in my life. Everyone else’s reaction does vary.

“Stressed. If I wasn’t doing what she wanted me to, she’d give me the silent treatment. I was always walking on egg shells around her. But don’t get me wrong when she was nice, she was lovely! But when she was “moody” for lack of a better word, it was awful.” –


I’d always feel this horrible feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach if I knew I would have to deal with these people/person.

“I found it so difficult to sleep, was unable to eat and couldn’t face going to work (we worked together. I would be so worried every day and I couldn’t concentrate on anything else.”


Life after being in a relationship or friendship with a toxic person is extremely hard. I still find myself finding dating and making friends hard because of past problems. I fear it’ll repeat again. You also become somewhat programmed to expect people are going to use or mistreat you and that your past experience will repeat itself all over again. For some of you, life after being around a toxic person might be able to resume back to normal fairly quickly but for others, it can take time. It is so easy to go over what happened but eventually, you’ll look back and praise yourself for getting out of it when you did! I sometimes still find it tough looking back but it’s something we will get through. Everyone’s healing is different.

“I think the hardest part of this was having no explanation as to why. I started questioning myself. Did I do something wrong? What did I do? Did she never like me at all? I went through so much doubt, frustration, and anger. After having a couple years to mull it over, I now know this was for the best. And it doesn’t matter what the reason was. Clearly, she was never as invested as me, and didn’t treat me with the same respect. Of course, that wasn’t fair to me. I’m lucky the friendship ended when it did; that finally opened my eyes.” –  Haley @
“Heartbroken, I still am.. The person in general I loved to bits so it hurts to loose someone you were so close to, but at the same time.. that constant feeling of worry and stress was lifted. I guess what I’m trying to say is.. You may love a partner/friend so much that you don’t realise how toxic that person is to you untill you let them go.” –

You’re not alone in the way someone is making you feel, talk to someone about what it is or how you’re feeling about the situation. Don’t suffer in silence! For me when things got really difficult with these friends and partners I spoke to my mum every time. Having someone that can shed some light or clarity onto things is very helpful. If you get really down and depressed, if your mental health is really deteriorating then please talk to a GP or ring a hotline. Look after number 1!

I wanted to say a quick thank you to all the ladies that helped me out with my post by sharing their experiences, their links are included in the post so go check them all out! It’s really brave and just shows we aren’t alone in all this. I hope my readers enjoyed this post and could also have learned something about dealing with toxic people. Stay safe out there! Take care – Beth x




Dating Resolutions for 2020

In the past, I have spoken about relationships, either when I have been in one or been single. I have been on all sides of the spectrum. Currently, I remain single for multiple reasons, mainly to work on myself before jumping into anything with anyone. But, that doesn’t mean I can’t get to know people and see where it may lead.


As a singleton, you can sometimes feel lonely or pressured to be with someone but it’s all about taking it at your own pace. I was the same and still am, preferably I like to take things slow and never rush.

I have resolutions for my dating life this year. Even though last year I had some horrible experiences in relationships and had my heart broken I was able to learn lessons about how important it is to always look after yourself in a relationship. This year after learning those things I would like to start getting back out there, back on the horse so to say. Dating can be quite hard, but I have teamed up with to hopefully make the journey easier for me and you. For me personally, I prefer free dating sites or apps.

Let’s go through some of my resolutions for dating this year!

Have fun

Make sure I can have safe fun on dates, loosen up a little more and not be afraid to be more humorous in front of potential partners. It can be hard not to seem a little scared of having fun when you feel nervous, as long as it’s safe then let’s all go for it and have a laugh.

Don’t rush

Sometimes I have panicked about not knowing where I stand with someone so then the relationship has been insanely rushed to feel as though we were getting to the point of being ‘together together’. Rushing a relationship can easily head for disaster. So let’s say my lesson has been fully learnt when it comes to the speed of things.


Still enjoy my own life

It’s quite easy in a relationship to become fixated on your partner’s life and hobbies. Now, I want to make sure I can still be engaged in a relationship with someone and at the same time focus on my own life without losing track. It’s essential to always look after your wellbeing and mental health in a relationship as much as it’s important to make sure you are carrying on with your hobbies.

Being open

Being open is key and sometimes it can be tricky. But I aim to be able to be more open in relationships by not feeling like I cannot talk to my future partner about things that may bother me about them, myself or the relationship. Finding someone you feel you can talk to openly and fully is always an indicator that they are a great match for you.


I now know to always have an open mind, not to pressure myself or any situation when I am dating. Hopefully, some of you can relate to my resolutions.

Beth x




(Disclosure – I was paid to write this post but all opinions are my own)

2019 Recap and Achievements

Recap for 2019

2019 has easily been one of the worst years I have ever endured. It has been full of pain, sadness and loss. I don’t want to portray this perfect life that isn’t true. Of course, every human has their ups and downs but that’s all part of the course that’s life.

Losing my best friend

In April I sadly lost my best friend to suicide. It was all so sudden and I was completely shocked. I was never fully able to come to terms with the fact he had felt so low he did what he did. Not a day goes by when I don’t miss him, his smile, his energy, everything. It taught me how important it was to talk about mental health instead of keeping it bottled up. If any of you are reading and feel this way too, stop and call 116 123 (UK). It’s a helpline by The Samaritans to talk about how you currently feel.

Toxic Relationships

I won’t touch too much on this one because I don’t really want to talk about it but, I ended a few toxic relationships and friendships this year too. Let’s just say even though it hurt me at the time, I came back out of them a stronger person.

Mental Health

My mental health kindly started to deteriorate around September, luckily after going back onto my medication, I feel a lot less helpless. It’s a slow process but I’ve got through it so many times I know I’ll be ok.


Due to a lot of issues in my personal life, I somewhat abandoned makeup and felt a little bit like I didn’t belong in the community. I found it really hard to be creative and express my art when people were being recognised and I wasn’t. Of course, I’m happy for those that were chosen it just sometimes feels like I am not enough. The one thing I have learnt is to stop comparing myself to others and do my own thing.


I know I have been kind of negative so far in my recap but, there are some positive changes that I made this year. I started to look after my psychical fitness more this year, I made working out a priority.


I have truly found some good friends this year, online and in my personal life. One of the people I’ve grown closest to is my friend Nicole . Even though she battles chronic illness she’s always there for me when I have been at my lowest. The second best friend I have made is Andy, this guy is truly kind and amazing. Thank you for being so amazing!

2019 may have been predominately awful but its been full of lessons. The pain I’ve gone through has taught me so much about myself, others and what to do in the future. Tomorrow I’ll be posting my 2020 goals so stay tuned!

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas mine was somewhat ok, I had to work all of Christmas so I only managed to spend a little bit of time with family. I am looking forward to all the content I have planned for 2010. Take care –  Beth x




How to Care for Your Mental Health This Christmas

Christmas time is full of emotion, excitement and joy especially. But for some of us, it can be a time where the season is full of depression and anxiety. I wanted to talk to you guys about ways you can care for your mental health when it’s hard at Christmas time. So grab yourself a cuppa (decaf for me) and let’s talk.

Talk to someone

Talk to friends or family. Anyone who will listen, talk to them. They don’t always have to be a mental health professional, sometimes it can just help to get your feelings out there. If you’re UK based (which most of my readers are) feel free to call The Samaritans on 116 123, they are a charity that talks to anyone who is in need of some support. You don’t have to be suicidal for this either. If you would rather be face to face with someone, The Samaritans do have drop-in branches which I will link in case you want to pop in instead.

Pamper yourself

Treat yourself to a cake you’ve been craving or that new DVD you wanted! Run a nice, hot bath and relax. Do a skincare routine, put on a face mask, do your brows. Feel good about yourself and take pleasure in caring for yourself.

Help others

Volunteer at an animal shelter or feed the homeless. Being social and interacting with others can sometimes ease your thought and make you feel good/positive about life. It’s nice to be nice.

Don’t go into debt worrying about Christmas

Money is a huge factor that increases anxiety and depression, don’t go into debt trying to please people. If you do have to buy gifts, maybe try to handcraft them as that could also serve as a distraction and hobby. This year I became anxious about what I had bought for family, so I ended up making loads of gifts through painting and other crafts I am good at.


One thing that has helped me this season is by having some organization. Putting everything in my phone calendar helped me see every meeting or social gathering I had to attend so I knew where I was.

Remember to breathe

I don’t mean just inhale and exhale, I also mean to stop and chill. Busy day shopping and wrapping presents? Go home, put a film on and relax. We can easily feel overwhelmed and making sure you take time to stop is essential to not going over the edge. One thing I also like to do when I feel a little ‘burnt out’ is either play The Sims or sit in my pyjamas all day and binge Youtube.

Numbers to call (UK)


Bi-Polar UK – Tel: 0333 323 3880 –

Saneline – 0300 304 7000 –

Mind – MindInfoline: 0300 123 3393 –

ChildLine – Helpline: 0800 11 11 –

Samaritans – Tel: 116 123 (Free) –

Take care this Christmas, I haven’t posted much for December as I have been taking time out for my own mental health but if you need anyone to speak to this festive season please call the numbers I included in the post. Merry Christmas – Beth x




Emetophobia & Me





Everyone has a fear, fears can stem from previous experiences or things you’ve generally have seen or heard. But, we are all afraid of something; Spiders, flying, heights, blood, needles and my phobia which is vomiting or seeing someone else vomit. My phobia started at a very young age and I want to show everybody the daily struggles that come with this specific phobia.

To ease the panic around my phobia there are things that I avoid and safety behaviours I do, some of these I don’t currently do but have done in the past;

  • Avoid meat and fish (food poisoning risk)
  • Obsessively wash hands and sanitise surroundings
  • Don’t eat in public through fear of vomiting in a restaurant, seeing someone else vomit or get food poisoning
  • Don’t go abroad through fear of getting heatstroke and air travel
  • Avoid boats
  • Take an obscene amount of antacids to relieve sickness symptoms
  • Fear getting pregnant because of morning sickness
  • I especially find it hard at the moment and have done since I was a child to stay the night at someone’s house in case I get sick!
  • Get scared to take new medication in case the side effect is sickness
  • Starve myself so I know I can’t be sick as there is nothing to ‘come up’
  • If someone says they’re not feeling well I avoid them at all costs
  • No alcohol 

It must sound so delirious to some people that I have an actual phobia of a bodily function and I find it so difficult to talk about because people seem to judge me for it. When I have told people in the past they have thought it was funny to start making gagging noises or to tell me about distressing times they were sick. One of the most common things people have said to me is “Well no one likes being sick”. This statement is true but for us emetophobics, just thinking about it is paralysing.

In January of this year just days after my 21st birthday my mental health took a slight turn. My phobia of being sick was starting to make my life more miserable, every time I went out I got waves of wanting to be sick but then they intensify as the panic of doing it in public increases symptoms.

So in late February I managed to start therapy through the NHS and I must say it’s helping a lot, I’m now able to eat in public and do more anxiety aggravating activities (e.g going out for a long time alone). The type of therapy for phobias is exposure and as I just mentioned I am trying to push myself as much as possible. CBT also plays a major part in recovery as OCD is one of the main contributors to avoidance and safety behaviours. As I go through therapy, some things are too scary to face at the moments but here are some things I have achieved.

My list of small accomplishments:

  • Sat through an entire film at the cinema without ‘escaping’
  • Sat in a pub and eaten a full meal about 4 times now
  • Spent 1+ hours in a supermarket alone without ‘escaping’
  • Been to certain places alone
  • Managed to go on multiple dates even though I’ve panicked I would be sick

Please do not be ignorant to other people that suffer from this, for others, the phobia goes to a mad extreme when they can’t even see the work s**k without getting a rush of panic. It’s a long journey I have still got but I am trying to give my all. I want to bring awareness to this phobia because most people think it’s a joke.  If anyone reads this and think they may have this phobia please talk to a therapist and get the ball rolling to recovery, yes it’s scary but you have to keep pushing.


I have been very open and vulnerable in this post, hope you enjoyed and feel a bit more educated on how this affects my lifestyle and thousands of other people. Take care – Beth x





How I Clean My Makeup Brushes

First of all, it’s so important to clean your makeup brushes/sponges because they harbour bacteria that can cause blackheads, breakout and irritation. I wash mine (depending on how much pigment is on the eyeshadow brushes) once a week. It only takes me about ten minutes but is increasing as my brush collection is ever growing!  In this post, I’m going to show you how I clean them and hopefully this can help you too.

When you wash your brushes you’ll need:

  • A bar of soap or cleanser (either is fine)
  • A clean towel
  • Cleaning Mat
  • Acrylic brush holder (optional)

Step 1

I set up what I like to call my ‘cleaning station’ which is simply where I lay my brushes out, place the silicone cleaning mat in the sink and have my makeup remover balm at the ready.


Step 2

I run the tap and make sure the water is not too hot but hot enough to get some form of lather from the cleanser. I then wet all of my makeup brushes.

Step 3

One by one I swirl my brushes around on the mat that is covered with the cleansing balm and make sure that the brush is going back to it’s original colour so I know that all pigmentation has left the bristles along with the bacteria.

Step 4

I clean my mat of all previous balm and water, turning on the cold tap I allow it to flow onto the brushes to wash out all product. To aid getting rid of the product I swirl the brushes in my clean palm.

Step 5

Once all brushes have been cleaned, I pat the bristles with a towel and lay them flat to dry.


I hope this post was helpful! I’m trying to grow my social media’s, so if you follow me I’ll follow back! I apologise for being slightly absent with posting, I’m becoming a lot more positive and I’m taking time to work more on myself hence why I might lack here and there. Hope everyone is well anyway, take care – Beth x

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2019 Goals – Blogmas Day 23

2018 is almost at an end, I’ve already reflected and recapped this year in my last post so it’s time to set some goals for the year ahead. I won’t list anything that’s insanely unattainable! Enjoy.



I would love to be able to start earning some form of income from blogging, in the future, I would love blogging to become my proper job as I’m sick of pulling pints for a crap wage.


Being invited to events would be incredible! Like to lush to make a bath bomb or to a makeup event! Would be absolutely amazing and I would love to experience it.

Get in shape/self-development

My main goal is to lose weight, build muscle and become healthier. I want to like what I see in the mirror more than I currently do. Also, sounds cliche but I will strive to self develop more and work harder on my mental health.

Attempt to travel

I don’t fly so I would like to aim to do more UK city breaks or Europe ones via the Eurostar.

Work with brands

It would be a dream and an honour to get the chance to work with brands that I love! A dream would be to work with a makeup brand or a brand that I follow heavily such as Deathwishco and Bomb cosmetics.

Be content

I just wish to be very content with life. Content with finances, myself and relationships


I’d love to collab with more bloggers! Let me know if you’d love to do this!

Day 23 done! I am not in the spirit just yet and I don’t really know why, hopefully, tomorrow it’ll sink in. But after this post please tell me your goals for 2019 below! Take care – Beth x

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Glitter Cut Crease Makeup Tutorial – Blogmas Day 7

Christmas, time for the family get-togethers or the work Xmas party. You wanna look your best, so whatever the occasion this holiday season, I have created a beautiful glitter cut crease tutorial to make your eyes shine brighter than the tinsel on the tree 🎄

Step 1

Fill in the brows to your desired shape and thickness with whatever product suits you best. I am using a pomade from BH Cosmetics. Outline the brows with a concealer of your choice, I am using the Collection concealer in Extra Fair as a base for eyeshadow and blending it out. As it slightly oxidised I set my brow bone will the shade Starlight from the Belle Jordan Obsession palette.

Step 3

I started by taking the shade Pops which is a light orange/brown shade and stippling it into the crease. After stippling, I took a Zoeva Luxe Crease brush and blended it all out.

Step 4

I then took a darker brown shade from a BH palette and blended that below the first shade.

Step 5

Finessing the rest of the blending, I finally added the shade Lola from Belle’s palette which is a highly pigmented black. I used a Makeup Geek Defined Crease Brush to pack this below my two brown shadows.

Step 6

Then I am taking the Collection Glitter Liner, cutting the crease with it and then blending the black shadow back in with edge of the liner so it doesn’t look so harsh!

Step 7

Adding lashes by Glamify Beauty in the style Cheeky Flirt, then going in with an inner corner highlighter and I am all set.

Product List:

Brows -BH Studio Pro pomade in Caramel

Eyeshadow -Obsession Belle Jordan Palette

Glitter – Collection Glam Crystal Liner in Glitz

LashesGlamify Beauty in the style Cheeky Flirt

Highlighter – Obsession Committed Palette

Day 7, I hope you enjoyed, you can find this look over on my Instagram below. Take care – Beth x

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June Favourites

We blinked a couple of times and June progressed into July, throughout the month I tried and tested lots of new products, here are my favourites. (P.S I know I’m late to the party)


Collection Glam Crystals Gel Glitter Eyeliner in Glitz  (Superdrug £2.99) This liner is perfect for lining a cut crease, inner corner or detailing. It’s very pigmented, buildable and super cheap!

Glitzibitz Loose Glitter (Ebay £1.75– These pots of chunky glitter are amazing! They help me to create lots of different themed looks, they can be placed in the inner corner on the lid or you can bathe in the glitter if you so wish. At £1.75 it’s a steal, I bought 6 pots in an offer the shop was doing and I paid under £6 for them.

Sugarpill Pro Pressed Eyeshadow in Love + (Beautybay £8) – As it’s pride month I’ve been creating so many rainbow looks (check them out on Instagram @bethhh_okxy). It’s a super pigmented red shade which helps me blend into other colours to create the perfect rainbow.


Garnier Micellar Water (Superdrug £4.99) Since using this micellar water I have found that my skin isn’t breaking out as much as it was, my blackheads have also lessened too which I’m super happy with. I use about 4 cotton pads to remove a full face and the water clings to the makeup, removing it in one swipe.

Mario Badescu Facial Spray (Beautybay £7/11) – This product has been super hyped in the makeup/beauty community, it has 5-star reviews on the Beauty Bay website and I see why. It has cleared up my skin so much! Most of the products I use in my makeup routine are matte so they can sit a little cakey on the skin, this spray just makes it all melt into a flawless base. It doesn’t have a horrible alcohol scent to it either which is another reason why I like this product.


Aussie Miracle Leave-in Conditioner Spray (Superdrug  £4.99) I love this spray, my hair is super dry from non-stop bleaching and this spray definitely helps. It makes my hair less frizzy and more manageable.


Zoeva Brow Line Brush 332 (Beautybay £8) – This brush is perfect for laying concealer under a bold brow, it helps with definition.

Zoeva 234 Luxe Smoky Shader Brush (Beautybay £9It’s not what it’s made for but I use this brush to cut my crease with concealer, it works a dream.

Zoeva Travel Mirror (Beautybay £8)– Perfect size for my very small desk, it pops up and folds away.

I can’t wait to discover some more new products this July, gonna raid some sales and see what I can get. I hope you enjoyed this post, let me know in the comments if you’ve tried any products I have mentioned. Take care – Beth 🙂 x

If you haven’t, feel free to check out my social media’s. I follow back!